Hi Hold,

I wonder if there are different ways to compliment her that won't feel so much about the weight.

Because whenever I lose weight, I HATE people to make a big deal out of it. I mean, I want you to like me/love me for me--and i hate that the world is so obsessed with looks!!!

Er, ahem.

Anyway, it's obvious she likes some of the stuff... the catcalls, the affirmations about what you like about her body, etc.

I"m sure those are all things you used to do, but stopped doing when she rejected them for so long. KEEP DOING THOSE THINGS.

Just don't compliment her on the weight loss if you can avoid it.

Lavish compliments on her body "I love the color of your skin." "Have I ever told you how much I like [insert a,b,c]". "You are so beautiful." "I love looking at you." Etc.

None of those things feel like they are tied to the weight loss, per se.

And if she says "Oh, that's just because I'm thin." You can say (truthfully) "That's not true. I've always loved your body. The difference is, you let me tell you now."

Come out of the hole. Don't refrain, just do it in a way that feels good for both of you.

You can do it!

Me 42
H 46
Married 12 years
Two children D9 and D4 !