Had dinner with Mrs. Hold and S15. Back at the office. I said it hurt to hear her call me pathetic. She said "I didn't say YOU were pathetic, I said it was pathetic that you feel better because your friend isn't getting any sex." I said "I'm not happy he is suffering, it just is easier to do without knowing that even he can't make it happen. It makes me feel less of a loser." She said "you keep telling me you are a loser. I never thought you were a loser. But you are starting to convince me. Maybe I am married to a loser."

I think we may be nearing a crisis point. Probably long overdue. Maybe it is not best for me or the kids to keep up this charade.


When you can see it coming, duck!