Originally Posted by Gerkaguards
This is the last email she sent me, 3 days ago. Aside from the one last night asking me why I put money in her account. You guys say this is normal WW behavior?

I guess you are just ignoring me now. So much for you 'love' me, and not threatening me and all that.

I have filed for divorce, the papers are in the mail. You will have to sign a waiver for anything to go forward. This is happening--certainly now that you are forcing my hand, so you have two options. You can sign now, or you can be served by law enforcement once you are back in country. Either way, I will not see you again, at this point, you are scaring me. Don't come to Arizona. I am moving apartments, so you won't be able to see me anyway.

Due to the fact that we haven't lived together since the first couple months of marriage, nothing that we really have is considered shared property, not the car or anything, so there is pretty much nothing you can fight me with. And, just so you know, I can change my mind about things too--I want my dog. Go ahead and have your parents hide him, that would be very illegal at this point.

It would have been nice to work this out like civilized people, but now I guess this is war.

Yes, it is typical. Don't read anything too much into it.

Except, since she mentioned you are ignoring her, I would maybe try to reach out to her a little bit. She's a very insecure person and I think she's afraid that YOU don't want anything to do with HER anymore. Let her gently know that is not the case. Just say something like, "I'm not ignoring you, I just though you wouldn't want to talk to me. I very much would like to hear from you. How are you doing?" Then just let her completely go off on you without you responding. You don't want to completely ignore her, you just want to ignore her provocations. At this point I would slowly, subtly try and engage her and get her to talk to you. If she keeps pressing you about divorce, all you say is, "You know where I stand on that," and let it go. This is where you need to start doing the subtle dance of trying to engage her about anything other than your relationship.


BS - 32 (me)
FWW - 33
Married 8/31/03
No kids (but 3 cats)
D-Days - 8/25/06 (EA), 11/3/06 (PA)
NC agreed to - 11/8/06
NC broken - 11/28/06, 12/16/06, 1/18/07, 1/26/07, 1/27/07
Status - In Recovery
Jim's Story