...and others saying it is our job to support [aka encourage / enable] his plan to save the marriage

Hi CH - It's OK, you can say RIF. I don't mind at all!

I'm sorry that you believe that assisting a fellow MB'er with trying to save his marriage as "enabling"... because I, like many others here don't see it that way at all.

I'm sorry that you and several others had to go through the pain and anguish of an A, and ultimately a divorce. I can not begin to ever understand the pain that you have gone through, and I DO understand your reasoning for wanting to "spare" Gurka the pain that you've felt.

Please understand that each of us here at MB are free to decide what is "best" for us as individuals. I was fortunate that by the grace of God, Mrs. RIF got the help she needed and turned her life around. Do I think that ALL WW's can do the same? Absolutely not. Some can and do turn their lives around... sadly, many do not.

Gurka knows full well what he is up against. He is not a child that needs someone with "more experience" to tell him what to do. Gurka isn't in a "fog"... he is demonstrating a maturity way beyond his years and knows what he is doing.

Please, respect Gurka's decision to fight for his marriage. He may eventually decide to NOT continue fighting for his marriage... but it really is HIS decision and not ours.

Semper Fi,


Me, BS

Her, Forgiven

Married Dec 86

Multiple A's that ended '90

Rebuilding In Faith since then...

Currently deployed to Iraq, but TEXAS is Home!