Gerka- Sorry you are here my friend, but you are getting some great advice. I don't know what took so long, but I just read through most of your thread here. What a busy two weeks you have had!

I am also a BS and my wife started her A while I was in Afghanistan last year. Unfortunately for me, I didn't know it was an affair until I came home. I wish I would have found this site while I was there.

Anyway, I just wanted to let you know I think you are doing a great job so far. Like Bob, I have recieved tons of helpful advice running the full spectrum of Plan A through immediate divorce. Your WW doesn't seem much different than mine or any other I've read about here. You know her better than anybody and if recovering your marriage is your goal, you are doing well.

I caution you to try not to let this consume you over there. I know I was a wreck at times and put myself and my Soldiers at risk due to the uncertainty of the situation. Don't let that happen to you. Every once and a while, mentally back up a second and look at the big picture. It will help you to keep things in perspective a bit. It also helps to re-read your whole thread from time to time to catch things you may have missed initially.

Since you are in Plan A, please remember NO EXPECTATIONS. She is still angry from exposure and will thrive on her anger to fuel her justification. Weather the storm and stay strong. Just keep trying to do the next 'right' thing.