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Why do you say that? If anything it sounds like she bought into her husband & my WW's lies.
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Oh, I wasn't responding to that post. I was responding to this... I think it's more likely that he wasn't answering when she was calling from the "affair phone" so she tried calling from her phone too. I hadn't seen the latter post until just now.
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Why do you say that? If anything it sounds like she bought into her husband & my WW's lies. If anything, I bet she's just upset that you put her husband's career in jeopardy and is blaming you instead of her H and WW. Her financial stability may take a serious hit, and she still has 3 kids to take care of. If financial commitment is one of her top ENs, she may not have been happy you exposed to her WH's CO. Again, don't worry about OMW. It really doesn't make much difference if she's on your side. From now on, just forward contact to your commander.
Jim BS - 32 (me) FWW - 33 Married 8/31/03 No kids (but 3 cats) D-Days - 8/25/06 (EA), 11/3/06 (PA) NC agreed to - 11/8/06 NC broken - 11/28/06, 12/16/06, 1/18/07, 1/26/07, 1/27/07 Status - In Recovery Jim's Story
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If anything it sounds like she bought into her husband & my WW's lies. But, I don't think that's the case. She knew about your WW's secret phone. And told you she believed OM was still lying to her. I think she is all about protecting her M and her H's career now. Don't feel badly about alerting her. You did the right thing.
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She hasn't bought into anything. She didn't refute their relationship. She didn't argue that you were lying about the call. What's happened, is that her world has collapsed. Her husband is under investigation. He will probably lose his career. OR, he is the one who is e-mailing you back and it's his world that is collapsing. He has already thrown your wife under the bus. He has been ordered not to speak or contact her in any way. And your wife has probably disobeyed a direct order in trying to contact him. That is what I read into it.
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I'm sure, when OMW tells OM about your email, it will only make him angrier at WW for continuing to try to contact him.
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You successfully killed the A.
THIS is a huge step towards recovering your M!
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In fact, on the chance that it was her husband intercepting your e-mail. I would send one last message. " As per your request, I will no longer contact you. The last message I sent you and the corresponding proof that there is still contact between your husband and my wife has been sent to command." This message alone will cause the pot to boil over. What's he going to do? Tell command to tell her to stop trying to contact him? Accept a call from her and tell her to never call him again? Either way he is toast. And most definitely the affair is over.
Last edited by ouchthathurt; 04/30/10 11:53 AM.
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Gerka-You are doing well. Keep it up. You have done everything RIGHT up til now.
BW(Me)aka Scotty:37 DSx2: 10,12 DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09 Plan B Dec18/09 Personal R in works Scotty's THING Newly Betrayed click herePraying for walls and doors. Thanx MM “Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.” ? Maya Angelou PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION THANK YOU
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In fact, on the chance that it was her husband intercepting your e-mail. If he hadn't intercepted the email, then his BW shared it w/ him right away. They are trying to save his career. So, it would make sense that she shared it w/ him before she sent her reply to Gerk. My best guess is that she already knew WW has been trying to contact OM. OM has probably been telling his BW about it. They are both trying to figure out how they can save his career.
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I would send one last message. " As per your request, I will no longer contact you. The last message I sent you and the corresponding proof that there is still contact between your husband and my wife has been sent to command." I agree 100%! Let OMW / OM know what's coming... remember, this is war and OM and your W fired the first shots... Semper Fi, RIF
Me, BS Her, Forgiven Married Dec 86
Multiple A's that ended '90 Rebuilding In Faith since then...
Currently deployed to Iraq, but TEXAS is Home!
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Think about it, Gerk, what other reply could she give you?
If she said, "I know, your stupid WW won't stop calling him!"
That email can be used against him...remember, she isn't sure you have hard proof that WW called OM..and even if she was, she wouldn't want to add to it.
If she says, "Thanks for letting me know, I'll keep an eye on him." Same problem. Another e-mail that could be used against him.
I'm certain they are freaking out that you know WW has disobeyed orders by trying to have contact w/ OM.
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Morning Gurka!
Hope you are doing well this morning... I think you have things well in hand with regards to exposure and ending the A.
It will take some time for you W to "get over" her 'in-lurve' feelings for OM...of course, his not answering her calls are a HUGE love-buster for her and will help end the A.
I'm sure OM fed her some of the standard lines about them being "soul-mates" and how they would "always" be together, and for her not to worry about "getting caught", blah blah blah... She's remembering all of this and starting to realize that it was all just a lie.
When the chips were down, OM dropped her without a second thought and went back to his W... That's why it's so important for you to keep up a good Plan-A. Regardless of how this turns out, SHE will know that when the "cips were down" that YOU stood by her and tried to save the M
Semper Fi,
RIF
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Good morning all. No reply to my email to WW. Looks like she's hijacked our netflix account today. I no longer have any access to it.
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rearranging the deck chairs on the Titanic.
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All of these accounts are joint property that she's depriving me of, in violation of the temporary injunction...
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She also never said she received the bear I sent her. Her birthday is on the May 25th, I was planning on sending her a Disney Collection of DVDs (she loves Disney movies) with every Disney movie ever made. The time window for mailing something from here to her is rapidly closing though.
Are birthday presents out? What should I do?
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Hey Gurka!
Our NIPR net has been down all morning so I had to wait until lunch to come back to my CHU and check in with you...
Don't know anything about what can or can't happen if she breaks the terms of the agreement, so I'll leave that to some of the others.
As for the Disney DVD's, I think that would be an excellent birthday gift for her. I wouldn't make a huge deal about it, maybe say something along the lines of:
"I know how much you love the Disney movies, so I thought that you would like this. Happy Birthday - Gurka"
Oh, did you get a reply from your BN Cdr regarding the additional phone logs that show your W calling the OM's phone?
Semper Fi,
RIF
Last edited by RIF; 05/01/10 04:46 AM. Reason: I can't type...
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It's not an agreement, it's a temporary injunction automatically issued by the court whenever someone files petition for divorce. She is immediately bound by it upon filing the petition. She is in contempt of court and subject to arrest and prosecution for interfering with judicial process. But I don't think jail will help our marriage.
I just didn't know if birthday gifts were acceptable during Plan A. She seems pretty intent on not talking to me at the moment.
No reply from BN commander. He does have a battalion (of 80 soldiers!) to run though.
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Birthday gifts are ABSOLUTELY part of Plan A. In PLan A, you are changing into the person who you really want to be. The best Husband and man YOU are. No Expectations though. Also, you don't want it to be too "in your face." It should be something that is the "norm" for you. You are practicing for a time when you will have a glorious marriage(whether it is with Mrs Gerka or the new Mrs.Gerka).
BW(Me)aka Scotty:37 DSx2: 10,12 DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09 Plan B Dec18/09 Personal R in works Scotty's THING Newly Betrayed click herePraying for walls and doors. Thanx MM “Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.” ? Maya Angelou PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION THANK YOU
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