Originally Posted By: holdingontoit
Interesting incident this morning. We were talking about Obama's nomination to the Supreme Court. I said "another Ivy League educated lawyer. Could have picked someone with a slightly different background." Mrs. Hold said "that is what we want at the Supreme Court. Big brained smarty pants people."

I smiled and with a twinkle in my eye asked "like anyone you know?" She frowned and said "yes, I am surrounded by them here. I am stuck with three of them. How did that happen?"

I leaned toward her still smiling. "Yes, I am sure it is terrible being surrounded by me and the kids." I leaned in slowly and aimed my nose to nuzzle with her neck. I knew not to try and kiss her because I had not yet brushed my teeth. I knew to lean in slowly to not startle her.

She shoved my head away from her quite violently with both of her hands. Not playfully. Not leaving open that I could continue to try and kiss her. But with a disgusted look on her face and hard enough that I almost fell off the bed.

I looked at her quizzically and asked in what I hope was a neutral tone "can you help me to interpret that gesture as something other than rejection? Because it felt like rejection to me." She started giggling nervously and said "you mean a two handed shove to the face?" I replied "yes, I just wanted to point it out so we are clear. Occassionally you ask me why I feel rejected so I wanted to point out that this is an example of you rejecting me." She said something like "yes, well, I guess most people would interpret shoving your head away as rejection."

I asked if she would do that to the kids. If they were discussing whether they got 3 or 4 or 5 A+ grades on their report card. If one of them leaned in for a hug. Could she imagine herself shoving them away with both hands? She said no and kept giggling like it was some kind of joke.

I too was laughing a nervous laugh. I didn't want to make too much of this. It was funny that I caught her in a "gotcha" moment. She was laughing and squirming in a "OK, you got me, I can't talk my way out of this one" moment. But despite the laughing, it still hurt.


That sucks.

Horrible horrible horrible!

I think you should use this as an opportunity to ask her what the h*ll goes on in her head that she would be abusive to you like that when you were trying to be sweet to her!

I think she was giggling because she knows what she did was insane, and it's hard to deny that something is wrong with you when you grab your husband's face in your hands and shove him violently away.

I'm so mad and disgusted for you right now, Hold!

If YOU had done that to her, you'd undoubtedly have had the police called on you!!!


Me 42
H 46
Married 12 years
Two children D9 and D4 !