Hold, you have a tremendous need for Admiration and Affection (let's just leave SF out of the convo for now...I'm not discounting it..just leaving it off to the side for the moment).

It seems obvious, that Mrs. Hold does not recognize/does not wish to meet this Admiration need. Why? Who knows. Perhaps because she doesn't have a huge need herself and doesn't recognize that is not an excuse for not fulfilling your need.

Maybe instead of focusing on the actual rejection ("aha, you did something wrong and I caught you"), can you turn it around and point it out as you putting your Admiration need out there and her clearly missing a chance to meet it?