Originally Posted by Mrs. Gerkaguards
The really sad part about your inability to accept that this is over is that it didn't have to be. We could have worked this out with alot of hard work and effort. It sucks that you made the decision for both of us to irrevocably end this.

Now she is admitting that she is SAD that the relationship is ending. I thought she was divorcing you because you were such a bad husband? Now it's because you exposed. Once/If she gets through withdrawal of OM, she'll start to see more clearly that you did not in fact irrevocably end this. The further she gets away from exposure, the longer she is in NC w/ OM, and the more you make love bank deposits, the more she'll soften her stance of the relationship being "irrevocably ended." Now she is actually sharing with you how she feels. This is a positive step. I think you have a pretty decent chance of recovering this marriage as long as there is NC w/ OM. THAT is the key. Keep being the best Gerka you can be. Call her on her birthday, send congratulations out to her sister and BIL for their marriage, and send a message to MIL and FIL regretting you couldn't be there but would have love to have been there. Maybe ask for some photos. Keep depositing the money monthly in her acocunt. Pretty soon she'll be questioning if she should be going through with the divorce.


Jim

BS - 32 (me)
FWW - 33
Married 8/31/03
No kids (but 3 cats)
D-Days - 8/25/06 (EA), 11/3/06 (PA)
NC agreed to - 11/8/06
NC broken - 11/28/06, 12/16/06, 1/18/07, 1/26/07, 1/27/07
Status - In Recovery
Jim's Story