She hasn't shown any signs of remorse or change. I doubt it's ever going to happen. It's been almost 1 month.

Hey Gurka,

We told you that you weren't going to see any signs of remorse or any significant changes when all of this started... There are some subtle changes that that you most likely don't recognize, and we keep pointing them out to you. I know that they're not the significant changes you'd like to see, but they are baby-steps in the right direction.

Like AW said, it will take MONTHS, not weeks, before your WW is able to start processing everything as an adult. For now, she's still in her Jr. High temper tantrum mode and looking for anything that she can to pin the blame for all of her "troubles" on you.

Please don't start doubting yourself. That's exactly what your WW is trying to get you to do right now. That's why she keeps sending you those vile little e-mails with various accusations and lies. If she can get you to start doubting yourself, then in her mind, she can justify her past actions.

She now has to deal with the fact that her entire chain of command, not to mention the entire OBC class that she'll start will now know that "She's the LT that was sleeping around on her husband while he was in Afghanistan." She doesn't want to face that fact, and she's trying to spin everything her way so that when she's confronted with the truth, she can say that you were a nut-case, you were abusive, and by the way, we were already going through a divorce!

Army communities are very tight, as you well know, and there isn't much that happens before the entire base knows about it. I'm sure that your WW has a few "buds" that will still support her aduterous behavior, but I can assure you, that most of her peers and others will not have a very high opinion of her actions.

As for the "it's almost been a month" comment... yeah, and look how far you've come in less than a month!!! You've ended the A with the OM! There are many here that haven't even taken that all important step and they're still sitting around wondering when their WS will leave the OP and come "home".

Try to focus on the positive actions that you've taken so far. You're doing a great job here and your actions ARE working!

Semper Fi,