I've been reading this thread for awhile now without saying anything. Since I'm a FWW, I just didn't really feel like I had much to offer. I spent 6 months waffling back and forth between my H and OM. I changed my mind about how I felt so many times it would make anyone's head spin. For several months, I was completely convinced that I wanted to D my H and marry the OM. I did some terrible things during that time. I even left my H and flew 3000 miles away to be with the OM so that I could "figure things out" and "decide what I wanted to do." I was a terrible, horrible, inconsiderate, selfish person during that time. I put my H through H@LL, and he stood by me the entire time and kept right on loving me even though I told him time and time again that I didn't want him to.

I did eventually come around and was able to see how much my H really loved me and cared about me. Some of us do, and some of us don't. There's no real way to know how things will turn out in your situation, but you seem like a good guy, so no matter what your WW decides to do, you're going to be okay. You're young and you have a lot to offer, rather it be to your WW or to some other woman. I know all this sucks right now and it feels like it will never end and that your life will always be caught up in this crazy, awful, carnival ride, but that really isn't the case. My family is going through some horrible stuff right now, and I wake up every morning and remind myself that this to shall come too pass, because that's about the only way I can get out of bed and do what needs to be done. Sometimes, that's all you can do.

Just know that your WW's decisions are no reflection on you as a person or on your worth as a human being. This is all about her and her own selfish decisions. The only person in the world you will ever have any control over is yourself.

Me: BS/FWW: 48
BS/WH: 50
DS: 30, 27, 25
DD: 28
OC: 10
BH and I are raising my OC together.