I know how unkind my words sound, Hold, but I truly believe you thrive in, or at least feel comfortable inhabiting, the environment you're in. The upset, the tension, looking for all the wrongs and how unsuitable or suitable you and your wife are. Maybe life is dull and the mental games are a way to keep yourself entertained.

You're the guy banging his head against the wall and people expect you to stop and discover it doesn't hurt when you stop repeatedly banging your head against the wall. But if you stop I bet you wonder if there is anything that will keep you occupied quite like the head banging does and the analyzing that goes along with it.

Formerly nam here since 07/31/03 coastal, CT