Mrs. Hold was curt on the phone all day and was in a pissy mood when I got home last night. I asked if anything was bothering her and she said "I didn't like that you said what you said this morning and then left to go to work". I thanked her for sharing her feelings with me.

We talked a little (not about that topic - gossip about D13's swim team and S15's trip). Then I had dinner and she came in to sit with me and talk more. Then I downloaded the pictures from the camera she and D13 took to Nationals. Made a disk to send to her father. She was still in a pissy mood when I tried to talk to her again, so I played PS3.

I call BS on her not liking the manner in which I presented my message. Yes, I know that is a DJ.

Wedneday night they got home from Nationals. I said to Mrs. Hold "I missed you. I want us to be romantically in love with one another. Can we work on that together?" She rollled her eyes and said "oh no, are we going to talk about that again". So she is seriously saying that she did not want to talk about being romantically in love on Wednesday night, but she wanted an opportunity to discuss my disappointment with the lack of sex on Thursday morning? Not. Bloody. Likely.

We did have something resembling an open and honest discussion of what bothers her about me. My not being strong and confident and a shark at work. I said I know it bothers her. She told me not to put words in her mouth. I agreed that was a DJ. I asked her how she feels. She said it bothers her that I am not strong and confident and a shark at work. I told her I know. I asked her if she was looking for someone safe and gentle in her personal life when she picked me. She said she was. I asked if she regreted not realizing that safe and gentle at home might mean something other than sharky at the office. She said she did.

Look people, I know what I need to do to improve my relationship. Kick butt at work so Mrs. Hold is impressed with me. I refuse to do that. So, as usual, I am getting what I signed up for. If I want to have a good relationship with Mrs. Hold, I need to kick butt at work. If I choose not to even try, then I have no one to blame except myself for her not respecting me. After all, I don't respect myself, either.