She is currently unwilling to focus on anything other than money. I am currently unwilling to focus on anything other than sex. It is possible one or both of us may choose to change our focus in the future. Focusing on the good things would require me to forgive myself. And forgive her. Even if I were willing to do the latter (unlikely). I know I will never be willing to do the former. I enjoy beating myself up far to much to give that up. Not even for happiness.

And you are correct about the income. I doubled my income between 1996 and 2001. Mrs. Hold was no more interested in meeting my needs at $200,000 per year than she had been at $100,000 per year. In fact, our longest "drought" not associated with pregnancy was fall 2001 into spring of 2002. Right after I got this job and the last big bump in my income. So I am probably fooling myself to think that she would be any more interest at $400,000 than she is at $200,000.

Still more reason not to bother trying to get to $400,000.