Had an hour long chat with WW shortly after I got back. It started off with her asking, "How miserable are you going to make my life?" I explained how all my stuff was ruined, car was broken, etc. She immediately came back with, "I want my stuff appraised too. If you don't have them look at it then I'll sue you for the damage to my stuff." She said her baby pictures, and other valuable photo albums, degrees\diplomas etc. were there and she really wanted them back. She also said her wedding dress was there and she wanted that back. I held a hard line about trying to do what was best for the marriage, asked her if there was anything that could be done, etc. She told me how I was the worst husband in the universe, listed off everything I've ever done wrong, and explained that we definitely would have worked things out if I hadn't turned her in to the Army. That even if she killed someone she would expect her husband not to turn her in. I tried to explain that the difference is that she betrayed me, and I didn't turn her in because I wanted to, but because I thought it was the only way to save our marriage. Her response: "Well it only made my decision easier." I explained that I had no choice when she plainly chose OM over our marriage and told me she wasn't interested in counseling or anything. She said if I had waited a few days instead of reporting her immediately, she would have changed her mind.

She was nasty, venomous and mean. I didn't accuse her of anything, call her names or anything.

Then Sunday, on our 2 year anniversary, a process server showed up to serve me divorce papers. Pretty cold on her part. It hurt.

She's been calling twice a day since then. I haven't answered. Today she left a voice mail to the effect of:
"I just want to check on our stuff, the apprraisals, etc. I know you don't want to talk to me right now, but if you could keep me in the loop through email or something I would appreciate it. I need to submit a leave form so I need to know when I can come and get my stuff."

I guess after getting served on our anniversary something inside me just broke. It's like she's not even a human being anymore. Since then I've been fighting the urge to throw all her things in the dumpster outside my house. I likened her stuff to our marriage via an analogy. No matter how badly I wanted to save our marriage, she could destroy it by herself. And I could make the aftermath painful and expensive for her, but that wouldn't bring the marriage back. Same deal for her things.

I talked to a good friend of mine that's also a lawyer, and asked him what to do about her stuff. He said:
Tell her it appraised for less than the value of the psychiatric care you're going to need to get over her [censored], so she shouldn't worry, you'll take care of it for her.

Made me laugh.

I'm really liking the idea of never speaking to her again. She's deploying in January, so I really don't think there's much she can do if I trash her things. It also makes it seem kind of petty that she wanted the dog back when she knows she's leaving for a year.