CWMI, it sounds like he's in a tit-for-tat mode in which you bring up something you are not comfortable with and he responds with something on your end or 2 things.

Aside from him thinking you should be okay with decisions related to his job, when he talks about the things you do wrong that is 100 pages wrong, does he go into specifics?

I could be wrong but it sounds like he has the typical traits a woman has (no offense to women) in which they store a bunch of stuff up and then just lash it all out at once when the man brings up something he is displeased with.

Husband (me) 39
Wife 36
Daughter 21
Daughter 19
Son 14
Daughter 10
Son 8 (autistic)