No, no specifics. He'll say something like, "Oh yeah? Well YOU make decisions and then tell ME that I just need to accept it!"

I'll say, "Like what? Give me an example of a time i did that."

And he'll say, "Well, I can't think of anything right now. But I'm sure i could list a hundred!"

Or he'll say, "YOU keep secrets, YOU lie!" I'll ask for a specific example, he'll have none ("can't think of one right now, but I will! Oh, you betcha I will!" or--even better--"oh, you know what I'm talking about, don't pretend you don't! I don't have to tell you, because you already know what I'm talking about, don't play dumb."). It would be hilarious if it wasn't my life.

It would be nice if he had specifics. Sometimes he does, but they're so way out from left field that it's hard to take the complaint seriously. I'll say, "I'm not happy about you buying a car without discussing it with me first." and he'll reply, "Oh yeah, well you spent an hour on the phone with your sister!" wth? Are these things related? Did he plan and execute the buying of a car during that hour-long conversation, and I was too busy to talk to? I would have gotten off the phone to discuss it! lol. This was not recent, btw, although we have had a recent discussion about car-buying--we agreed that barring an emergency, we would not purchase another car until the end of 2012. Then I caught him shopping for one online, narrowing his search down to our local area for a specific vehicle. He was offended that I would question him about his intention, after all, it was no different from me looking at multi-million dollar mansions for sale. Um, he has NEVER come home to discover that I have bought a $5mil mansion, I have come home many, many times to discover that he had bought a car without discussing it.


Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
(Oscar Wilde)