RMJ, the most telling thing for me about the whole travel issue/conversation was that H was a bit testy the first day. By the end of the second day he was jovial again, affectionate, so I mentioned that he seemed in a much better mood, why was that? and he said that he felt much better having gotten it off his chest in having that convo w/his boss.

We don't have a united front, and that is huge, you are correct. He still, to this day, insists that travel *should not* be a problem, and told his boss as much...what he told me he told boss was that the two of them could believe all day long that it was not an issue but *I* am hurt by it, so he is not going to hurt me with it anymore. I did ask him, so you think it shouldn't be a problem...has it ever NOT been a problem? No, he admitted, it has always been a problem FOR ME. I asked him, it hasn't been a problem for you then? He said no. So I said, it's never bothered you to upset me then? He totally separates my feelings from his actions, even though I know he's been educated to the contrary.

No, I can't say he does many 'activities' with the kids...occasionally, but nothing on a regular basis...mostly it's him letting them help him with his projects. He'll assist with bedtime rituals and things like that. He just took two of them to help him get a load of wood in prep for a snowstorm heading our way. He'll be with them this afternoon while I'm at a babyshower. We all went to a friends' house last night for movies, pizza, and games.

Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
(Oscar Wilde)