I totally understand you being annoyed at her for talking to your daughter first. Just after that you chose to allow it to continue, and decided the best course of action was to go along with it, and so that was your choice.

I sometimes find it hard not to blame dh for decisions I've made because I've been unwilling to stand up for myself, but its not fair to do that.

Me: 32
H: 35
Married 9 years, together 12.
Two little girls, 7 and 3.