Yes, we POJA'd access. If we HADN'T, I would have harped on him until I got my way, don't you think? I'm not above strong-arming my way. I'm not above 'going over his head'. My problem here, with access, is that I DIDN'T, I believed him, and that bit me in the butt.

Yes, we talked about how he felt about me checking up on him. He did not like it. People who want to maintain a life separate from their spouse NEVER like being checked up on. So? What's your point? I should be happy for him to keep secrets from me, to maintain a secret life separately? You're nutz. smile

You seem very protective of his IB, Telly, and I can't imagine why.

Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
(Oscar Wilde)