If I could combine the two guys that would be so awesome. That is, if the new combo-man actually liked me :-) Actually, the new guy is very much like the other guy, just in a different line of work, and a bit younger so not as financially secure as the other.

I don't know what it is about this guy. He caught my eye when my friends and I had gone out to dinner. I like a certain type of look- nice guy, teddy bear yet still very strong. He asked if I would take his number, and I said no because I would never call it.

Usually when I say this, the guys shrink away. Which is fine because they usually want sex and I already know I wont be able to satisfy them given my history. But he said well, well... will you give me your number so I can call you. and when he said that, it was all over. I was hooked. I wish I could explain it, but I cant. And I really wish something like this would have happened back in college, not NOW that Im a single mom with a lot of baggage ;-)

Being around him I feel very feminine. He is very tall, very broad, hands bigger than mine (my ex used to call them amazon hands b/c they're bigger than most mens hands!) and I feel very feminine when he holds me. I'm in great shape, awesome figure, but I'm very broad. Most people who only see me in pictures are shocked to see how broad I am in person. He can wrap his one arm all the way around my linebacker shoulders. And he can pick me up with ease. As if I was a size 0. He also does sweet little stuff for you, making sure things are right (like if the meal is wrong, asking the waitress fix it rather than tell me to just eat it and dont make a scene like my ex and other guys have). He also disarmed me emotionally because when I told him we needed to take things very slow physically, he said hed been single now for 2 years and waiting another year wasnt gonna hurt him. But its not even been a month, so this could all be a front hes putting up. And there are a few things I dont care for about him, but theyre not big deals (right now).

Even if its a front and if Im not seeing him next month :-) Im glad for this experience. I NEVER felt anything like this while in high school, college, or marriage. Even with the handful of guys I was attracted to, I never felt anything as strong as this. So now I feel a little bad that I told people I had felt attraction before, because this is totally different.


"If you will stop feeding your feelings, then they will stop controlling you" -Joyce Meyer