So you are saying if I read correctly, just do my thing filling up her love bank regardless of anything indefinitely? In the mean time I walk away from all fights , tell her when she hurts me nicely, and hope that she'll change? No offense to you all but prior to finding this forum I had unknowingly Bern the giver and her the taker for a long long time. By no means am I perfect but I'm a pleaser and I've worked a long time doing just that as it us my nature. My concern with this program is that my wife learned growing up that she doesn't need to accept responsibity fir her actions. every time I let her know she hurts me she just rejects it so how I compete with that?

Married 15 years
12 y/o DD
10 y/o DS
6 y/o DD