Absolutely tell her that you do not intend to live in a sexless marriage! BUT, also tell her that you're willing to stop the LBs that have eroded her love for you and meet her ENs in a way that makes her feel loved and valued. Otherwise it sounds like a threat.

To get her to talk to Steve (I assume you know who he is now?), try this: "My goal is to have a marriage where we both are madly in love with each other. I've read a lot about this Marriage Builders program and I think it is right for us because I think it works. I understand that you may be a little skeptical and I respect that. However, I am asking that you join me for a conversation with Steve Harley before you make a final decision about whether this is for us or not. Just a chat on the phone, how about it?"

My H initially said no, no more counseling...I said it wasn't counseling, it was coaching...he said no...I said well I have an appointment with him on [date and time I knew my H would be available], I don't know what to do here and *I* need a coach, but I do wish you would join me so he can get both sides. Oh yeah, he was there to give his side, bwa-ha-ha. H was READY for SH to straighten me out.