Originally Posted by kilted_thrower
Well, good luck to you then.
And many of us on here haven't had infidelity just not great marriages that we have used MB to make them great marriages. I haven't had infidelity in my current marriage and at one point was dealing with a lot of the same issues you are. Not anymore.

Regardless if you think there's infidelity or not, you're going to get resentful about your needs not being met and it's going to poison the marriage. But that's up to you if you keep allowing yourself to be a doormat. A doormat=she basically does what she wants, says what she wants, and dismisses how you feel or what you need and you support it while you're just meeting her needs.

I agree and I am resentful of my needs not being met, my wife knows this and will no doubt read this which is fine. All I can do is speak from the heart and let my wife know how I feel. I thought a lot about replying to these posts and although I have a part of me that wants to "keep the peace" and not offend her, I know the right thing to do is just be honest and see if we can come to some agreements on what is important in meeting each other's EN's.
I don't think my wife treats me like a doormat and does whatever she wants, I do however think that I neglected her EN's for so long during the first part of our marriage that she had to find alternate sources to find them. That would be her friends, running, etc. She is running right now in fact, but she let me cuddle a bit with her this morning before she left so its a small victory. She gave up wanting to meet my EN's but I really think I started it! smile Either way we know where we stand and although it will be a lot of work I am excited at the possibilities.

Married 15 years
12 y/o DD
10 y/o DS
6 y/o DD