Originally Posted By: HoldHerHand
Originally Posted By: Hilltopper1972
I'm definitely messed up from this forum. My marriage is infinitely worse after following the advice of some of you in here. I basically told my wife for the second time that I don't trust her, she hates my guts for it. It probably wasn't even fair. I believe in many of the principles here and I think there are parts of me that have improved after reading the book. I DO NOT however believe that I'm better off after interacting with many of you. The problem is your own experiences taint the advice that you give. I went from trusting my wife 100% to accusing her of cheating within a month of being here? You can be offended if you want, I don't give a crap. I just can't do this anymore so I'm not gonna read here anymore, sorry. I'll read your replies, no doubt many of which will tell me otherwise, but I'm not gonna throw away my marriage because someone tells me that get keylogger software and to record my wife's phone calls. I'm sorry you or some of you had infidelity issues but that is not the case here. Best of luck to you all.

Steve, Dr Harley, if you read this great, I hope you do. I'm sure you enough experience in helping marriages where my comments likely won't effect you and that is fine. You do however need to be aware of what's going on here in an open forum, ok?



Um...

Who told you to march up to her and tell her "I don't trust you!"

?

Really?


Anyone?

Did anyone here tell you to confront her because you found out she changed her underwear before she went running?

?

No?

Anyone?


Nobody here told you to puppy dog her, and confront her at every turn. That is what you decided to do on your own. That was NOT the advice you were given.

Nor would it be to install spyware on her phone, and then question her about every phone call after you hear it, which is what you would seemingly do, and then blame the board for giving you the advice.

So begins the same post many posters previous to you have made; it just ain't happening guys, you are wrong!

Within the next year, it will be "I'm back guys, and you were RIGHT!"

Which is too bad, because there will be a lot of wasted time in between.


I'm not gonna justify that response. Read the entire thread, you can see some very clear cut advice to "get snooping" among other things.


Married 15 years
12 y/o DD
10 y/o DS
6 y/o DD