Originally Posted by CWMI
Hill, I'm a very literal debater as well, with the added bonus of NOT being a conflict avoider. I'm a flipping JOY to live with, lol. One piece of very valuable advice I got from Steve Harley was to SLOW DOWN--I can state my complaint, and even if I have a hundred workable solutions already figured in my head, I need to back off and give my H room to work out some solutions for himself. Perhaps this would be valuable to you, as well.

Complain, once. Then wait.

State your opinion. Then shut up. smile

T/J, borderline O/T;

I had a communication strategy passed on to me by one of my instructors.

The presenter was talking about communication in marriage, and the difference between her and her husband.

She was very knowledgeable and expressive, where he was succinct and fact-driven.

So, she could deliver a five-minute dissertation on a sink full of dirty dishes, the history of dishes, and how they affect society.

For him, it was simple; DISHES. DIRTY. STOP.

To facilitate communication between the two, the following advice was given - HE should; listen for five minutes. SHE should; get to the point, and avoid the dissertation on the social history of fine dinnerware.

Of course, this doesn't bleed into casual conversations and discussion - but, when communicating between two people, it's often best to bring a solution that facilitates both parties.

"An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field." - Niels Bohr

"Smart people believe weird things because they are skilled at defending beliefs they arrived at for non-smart reasons." - Michael Shermer

"Fair speech may hide a foul heart." - Samwise Gamgee LOTR