Originally Posted by markos
Originally Posted by Hilltopper1972
We are definitely more inclined to speak politely to each other and respectfully. We don't fight about anything other than our relationship. It is almost always me bringing something up, her firing back. I always pursue her to talk, I always want to fix things after a fight right away.

Hill, let's be honest, here:

After a fight, you'd like your wife to get over it. Who wouldn't?

If she's still feeling raw, and you've gotten over it, you'll be really tempted to try to set her straight. As little control as you have over your emotions, this desire is going to seep out of every crack, and she'll see it. It will not turn her on. It will disgust her. And rightly so, because who wants to live with a critic and a dictator?

Your desire to fix things sounds noble. Your desire to straighten her out doesn't sound so noble, does it?

I'll just chill then. I called her this morning and told her, "If you are feeling up to it, call me and we can chat more." She's obviously still mad and doesn't want to talk so I won't force the issue despite my desire to do just that. I'll get her something or do something nice on the way home.

Married 15 years
12 y/o DD
10 y/o DS
6 y/o DD