Affection is still not good from my wife. This was my #1 EN and she knows that but yet when I hug her, I initiate always and she has this habit of dropping her arms to her side when I do. The other thing she does is do the "push off" when we hug as if to say "Ok, 3 seconds is enough". Body language is pretty powerful. When we kiss it is only a peck on the lips because, "my breath is bad". When we snuggle on the couch, unless I say, "lets spoon", she'll like down by my feet. Obviously no SF either, but that I realize will take some time. Clearly affection doesn't come easy for her and I don't know if that is how she is with everyone or just me. I don't think it is selfish to want my wife to want to be affectionate with me rather than going through the motions right? The no affection thing isn't a post-baby thing, its been going on for a long time. I plan on asking her about affection in general and see how she feels about it and why her body language speaks volumes. It hurts and creates no security on my end in this relationship. The strange thing is affection is one of her top 5 EN's.

Married 15 years
12 y/o DD
10 y/o DS
6 y/o DD