Originally Posted By: markos
Hill, we don't have to look too far back to see a number of love busters on your part. You've busted some holes in your account in your wife's love bank, and it's going to take a little while to fill it back up. And of course, filling is going to be impossible if you continue to make holes through love busters.

That is why I keep encouraging you to focus on making large love bank deposits, and I keep asking the question (which I notice you don't often answer): "What are you planning to do nice for your wife today?"


I'm not dodging the question about doing nice things for my wife. Saturday night, made her a Buffalo Mozarella Napoleon, made it look amazing, sent her a picture of it to her phone because she was upstairs. She came down looked at it, said, "what are we gonna eat with it?" Not a wow or a thank you, she just wanted crackers or bread with it. I got out some rolls and crackers and we ate it together. The reaction is what I want to point, she appears indifferent to nice things almost as if she doesn't want to give me the satisfaction of a complement or thank you. I got her a very nice bottle of wine to drink at my parents house because she loves pinot noir and my parents don't carry that. She liked the wine, but again, no reaction. I'm not looking for her to grab my hand and run upstairs to the bedroom by any means, but her body language and comments appear to me as her being either indifferent or oblivious to the attempt. I'll be doing something nice again today after work and I hope that my efforts are having an impact but that she isn't expressing herself when they do.
As far as LB's go, none for three days, and on a few occasions when I wasn't certain I asked her and she said no. Our avoidance of LB's on both sides has much, much better because we know what to look for.


Married 15 years
12 y/o DD
10 y/o DS
6 y/o DD