I'm not dodging the question about doing nice things for my wife. Saturday night, made her a Buffalo Mozarella Napoleon, made it look amazing, sent her a picture of it to her phone because she was upstairs. She came down looked at it, said, "what are we gonna eat with it?" Not a wow or a thank you, she just wanted crackers or bread with it. I got out some rolls and crackers and we ate it together. The reaction is what I want to point, she appears indifferent to nice things almost as if she doesn't want to give me the satisfaction of a complement or thank you. I got her a very nice bottle of wine to drink at my parents house because she loves pinot noir and my parents don't carry that. She liked the wine, but again, no reaction. I'm not looking for her to grab my hand and run upstairs to the bedroom by any means, but her body language and comments appear to me as her being either indifferent or oblivious to the attempt. I'll be doing something nice again today after work and I hope that my efforts are having an impact but that she isn't expressing herself when they do.
As far as LB's go, none for three days, and on a few occasions when I wasn't certain I asked her and she said no. Our avoidance of LB's on both sides has much, much better because we know what to look for.