Originally Posted by Hilltopper1972
By the way she did say, "If we don't stay up late for a week and drink wine, then we can hang out comment." I pointed out this was an SD, she didn't like my having done so. To her credit later she said, "How can I respectful ask you not to stay up super late with me?"

What did you find disrespectful or demanding about the way she asked? It sounded quite respectful to me, like a request, not a demand.

We've been having fun together so the staying up late seemed natural to me, like if it ain't broke don't fix it.

Okay, your perspective here sounds pretty valid to me, but are you saying that her perspective should not have even been expressed? That she was wrong to suggest change?

Remember to use the policy of joint agreement as your guide. If one of you becomes unenthusiastic about something you are doing, even if it's something you've negotiated before, you immediately STOP DOING IT! and begin negotiating something else. Be creative and brainstorm and look for something that will make you both happy.

If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app!

Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8.
Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010

If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.