The Giver and Taker are not good/bad in and of themselves. They are instincts to watch for within yourself. Your Giver will give without regard to your own welfare, and this can get you into trouble, so you should learn to watch for it. Your Taker will take without regard to your wife's welfare, and this can also get you into trouble, so you should learn to watch for it.

You should also pay attention to your wife's Giver and Taker. Her Giver may be making sacrifices to do what you ask for. Never pursue a reluctant agreement; if she is reluctant about a request, change the circumstances of what you are requesting in a way that makes her ENTHUSIASTIC about what you are requesting, or else WITHDRAW the request.

Also, her Taker is likely to give you VITAL INFORMATION. Her Taker will naturally not take your welfare into account. Do not punish her for this. Instead, use the information her Taker gives you about what she wants, and brainstorm ways to meet the needs her Taker expresses in ways that you can be enthusiastic about.