I thought about this statement a lot about it not being about "me". I believe this judgement is justified in terms of it's intent for sure. I've shown that I think selfishly about me first and foremost. What you may not know is that although I haven't shown my wife that I want to create love in our marriage very well I still do love her more than you can imagine. I always have. Do I show her correctly? No not at all man, I've abused her for years. I'm paying the price for this as is she. I want to give this woman all that she deserves. I want her to feel the love for me that I feel for her. I have failed in this endeavor thus far but I intend to change that. She is sooooo friggin amazing, and instead of cherishing her I blew it. I made her feel bad. I didn't know what to do nor how to handle it, but I do now. This isn't a false promise whatsoever. I'm just an idiot and never understood what I was doing. Needless to say, I think you'll see things change around here, starting with me. Otherwise I'll lose her, and that would crush me and it would crush her more. I can't wait to see her tomorrow morning as she is asleep, but when she awakes I'll tell her again how sorry I am for my behavior. She may or may not believe me but this is a start, and that is all I can do.