Hi CWMI, I'm not telling you to drop the DJs for your husband's sake. I don't know if that would impact him the way everyone keeps telling you it will if he really has a disorder.

I say that because my ex has not been formally diagnosed, but he is the kind of guy who I�ve never seen (in 12 years of marriage plus 3 years of dating) exhibit remorse for having hurt someone. I�ve seen him be sad about things not working out for him, but that�s not the same thing. So I tried all the �fix your marriage� stuff but you can�t fix NPD. The person has to be motivated to fix it themselves.

The reason I�m asking you to look at some of your feelings and frustrations about your H, is for YOUR sake. For your own peace of mind. To see if there�s a way you can view it that causes less frustration, less stress, less anger for YOU. I don�t care about your H. He sounds like a selfish jerk to me. Wait... is that a DJ? lol! I�d probably still be married to my own ex-jerk if he hadn�t lost his mind. But by changing my internal dialogue, I was able to come to greater peace and less frustration until we actually divorced. I hear an extreme amount of frustration in your posts, and I don�t think you should be doomed to that eternally just because your H won�t change.

"If you will stop feeding your feelings, then they will stop controlling you" -Joyce Meyer