The enq is supposed to show you how to meet those needs because it shows how you want them met.

Stop being terrified. It will cause her to lose respect for you. And when a woman loses respect for her husband/a man, they are in trouble.

If you two are not getting your time in, then she should not be running outside gardening while you're inside with the kids. How old is the baby exactly? You need to learn to speak up (without being disrespectful) and let her know that certain things make you unhappy.

Husband (me) 39
Wife 36
Daughter 21
Daughter 19
Son 14
Daughter 10
Son 8 (autistic)