Good news: finals tomorrow and Maymester is done!

Bad news: I'm annoyed. smile

I think I mentioned the hunting thing before. Short version: H came home when the youngest child was just a couple weeks old and announced he was 'taking up hunting again'. Surprised me, I never knew he hunted to begin with. Never mentioned it, none of his friends or family mentioned it, he had no equipment, not even a camouflage cap...anyway, this was pre-MB, but I attempted a POJA, didn't work because he agreed to it then did what he wanted to anyway. It was a horrible experience. He sold all the new equipment he bought and it's been a non-issue since then.

Til today. smile Same guy he was with during The Phone Call (earlier upthread) sent him an email about his hunting property and an offer: "I'll take you in Oct/Nov". My initial reaction was something like, "The he** you will." H's response to the email was non-committal and didn't reference the invite at all.

Here's where I'm annoyed: H didn't meet this guy until several years after the 'hunting incident'. But obviously he's been talking about hunting with this guy and has indicated an interest in doing the activity. Further annoyed because I talked to H about it and he denied ever indicating that he had an interest in it. Huh, wha? Okay, I said, then why don't you decline the offer? He said: "I haven't really decided whether I would want to go or not."

Fair enough. Problem is, I can't think of a single thing that would make me enthusiastic about my H taking up a hobby like hunting. Before MB, I attempted to 'sacrifice' to make him happy but I'm not going to do that now! I don't want to be married to someone who goes off on hunting trips. Good Lord, we've had enough issue with business trips. I've already told him before that I never would have married a hunter. I'm resentful over trying to give him what he wanted before and getting taken advantage of. I still have no interest in a person who goes hunting, or on any other overnight activity, and I don't trust him NOT to stay overnight because we've made that agreement so many times before and I got screwed every. freaking. time. I want it back to non-issue.

So, for POJA, I'm okay to stick with not-enthusiastic-ever-nevah stance, right? I was NOT enthusiastic before when I agreed to him going. I am much, much less enthusiastic now. It would take less than one season for me to not love him. I would seethe with anger the first minute he was out the door just remembering that night he abandoned me with a newborn+2 babies+7yo.

Okay, this might work for POJA: take us with him, and hunt with his sons. I could agree to that. Good? He wants to talk about it later.

Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
(Oscar Wilde)