That makes sense. AT the same time, though, it�s kinda out of your hands. The singles group at my church is mostly younger never-marrieds with no kids. They just don�t understand what I go through when it comes to rearing my son, and when they (even the guys) talk about future marriage they are soooooo far off the mark but I�ve given up trying to educate them. I will admit, even though I KNOW the swinging single life isn�t all that great, rather than say so and offend everyone I will beg out on account of my son.

I think the difference is in how he feels. Does he really feel like your family is keeping him from living the life he wants to live or is he just acting that way to go with the flow. And if it�s acting and it still bothers you (NOTHING wrong with that) does he understand that it bothers you (note, I didn�t ask had you told him, but does he understand).

Now if he really feels like you all are holding him back from a big, fun, life that�s a whole separate subject! When my marriage was crumbling, I will admit I made my hours longer and longer at work because coming home was so painful. Even to the point of picking up my son and bringing him to work with me. Being at work was so easy and less stressful. I was GOOD at work. At home all I got from my H were constant reminders that I was not GOOD.

Since your H appears to crave the success and admiration he gets from work, but either can�t figure out how to get that from you or isn�t willing to put forth the effort, I don�t know what to tell you if that�s the case (ie his eyes are fixed on what he�s missing out on). You are right that he would be better to surround himself with marriage-friendly, supportive, people. But how can you motivate that change? And how will you keep CWMI happy if he doesn�t?

"If you will stop feeding your feelings, then they will stop controlling you" -Joyce Meyer