Originally Posted by Hilltopper1972
You know what Prisca, I have no idea what she is enthusiastic about. You know how I know? Because she won't ever answer me. I send her a text asking if we could do massages and yahtzee last night and she responds back with, you need to get a vasectomy. I email her about some suggested dates we can schedule wine, no wine, scrabble, who makes dinner, etc, she doesn't answer me. If I point blank ask her what she'd like to do she says, "I don't know what do you want to do?" So I make suggestions, they mostly go unanswered, shot down, or put in the "we'll see" box to never be addressed again.

There is no solution to this other than to meet emotional needs and avoid love busters. Your wife is in withdrawal. She will venture out of withdrawal sometimes for conflict. You must get in the habit of meeting her emotional needs all the time and avoiding love busters all the time so that when she ventures into conflict you will slowly make progress towards her moving into intimacy.

It will not be easy. You will need to do it even if she engages in love busters and even if she does not meet your needs.

But if you focus on you and make this happen, you will save your marriage. She will move back into intimacy and then she will finally reciprocate with enthusiasm. Only then.

Start thinking long term. She is going to move back into intimacy before you do.


If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app!

Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 17 years, who is a beautiful angel.
Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010

If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.