Originally Posted by kilted_thrower
It's different. As you get comfortable with the program and learn to POJA, you'll find alternatives that make you both happy. As an example, I used to play indoor soccer at times that my wife didn't like and it took away family and UA time. We found a solution in which worked for both of us. The conflict was. Not the activity but the time. This was pretty easy since games go jntil 1am in the morning. So we found a mutually enthusiastic compromise in which I still played but play during times that she is happy with

Its kind of a chicken before the egg thing you know? You can't become each other's favorite person to spend time with until you actually do spend time with each other. On the other hand, you likely have not been pleasant to be around in the past and therefore could struggle to spend time with each other now. My wife and I are compatible doing certain things, but not others. We filled out a workbook and have a lot of activities we can do together but we need to give it a shot. I LOVE golf, she loves running, but they don't intersect in terms of good RC. I was thinking about seeing is she would be willing to ride in the golf cart with me for about two hours followed by drinks and appetizers on the 19th hole! POJA is great because it forces you to think outside the box. What I do know is for the time being I would never leave for an entire round of golf with the fellas, just like she would never leave for a three hour run.

Married 15 years
12 y/o DD
10 y/o DS
6 y/o DD