I think it's the bending over the pool table.

I'm still pulling teeth here, but that's only because there's still teeth to pull...funny start to this evening. H came home from work in a lather to cut the grass, immediately, right then, quick peck and it HAD TO BE DONE. I was watching him change from day work clothes to yard work clothes and said that I didn't like it when he jumped right into chores as soon as he got home (this is an old story...). He said, "But it has to be done!"

I said, "I have to be done, too!"

He did a double take, unsure of my meaning (I mean, he didn't have any pants on, ya know?) and asked me what I meant by that.

I told him I like a few minutes to connect with him, like it when he unwinds a minute before jumping into what NEEDS TO BE DONE, we haven't seen him all day.

He said, "Why is it YOUR feelings are the only ones that count?"

I said, probably louder than I should have (bad CWMI), "I just vacuumed and mopped this entire house because of YOUR feelings!"

He looked shocked, finished changing, went and got a glass of water, sat down in the living room and said, "So how was your day?" just as pleasant as can be.

I don't like the daily retraining--he said that if I just had the house vacuumed every day when he came home, he would come in and relax and connect--but my family is worth it.

He's outside now, cutting grass, after asking me if I was okay with him getting started. We had a good half-hour of chit-chat, he connected with the kids, of course I'm okay with it! And I thanked him less profusely than I will later.