Originally Posted By: Hilltopper1972
Just got back from vacation with my family and a few other families. It was fun but tiresome. Wife and I have not been following the program nearly as much as we did before. I don't even know where she put the workbook.

Find it.

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I've approached her a few times about being concerned but she seems disinterested. She keeps saying she doesn't want to talk about it.

Stop approaching her to talk about it, and start doing it.

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The LBs are few and far between, but the meeting of ENs are pretty much dead so I'm unhappy again.

Okay, so you've stopped punching holes in her lovebank, now it's time to fill it up. Neither of you are going to feel great with empty lovebanks ... it's called neglect.

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I could be better, but have tried to focus hard on her two most important ENs which are financial support and admiration.

Neither of these are the 4 Intimate ENs -- SF, Affection, RC, Conversation.

FS is important to her, but it will not cause her to fall in love with you. Dr. Harley says that when the non-intimate ENs are at the top of a person's list, it is most likely because they are in withdrawal.

Start meeting the 4 Intimate ENs -- these should be what your UA time concentrates on.

Your admiration will probably be more affective, too, if you are meeting the 4 Intimate EN.

Is she still willing to have UA with you?

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Have any of you Vets kind of drifted away from the MB Program and found yourselves in need of going back to the basics?

It happens. Don't let it discourage you. Just pick up the pieces, and start over.

The basics are for the Vets, too, btw. They're not just for beginners. You're creating a new way of life here, and any time you let it slide, old habits are bound to show through.


Markos' Wife
FWW - EA
8 kids ...
What to do with an Angry Husband