Originally Posted by SugarCane
Originally Posted by Hilltopper1972
One more thing because SF is the most important thing to me and to most guys. I have an appt for getting a V tomorrow. What little sex we do have I want to be good for both of us mentally and physically. To be honest I expect nothing to change in that department but I'm doing it anyways. We'll see how it goes.
This is a huge issue of contention between you, isn't it? And you were at an impasse. If you decide to go ahead with the vasectomy, make sure you do it enthusiastically. If you do it reluctantly it will cause enormous resentment in you - especially if nothing changes afterwards with respect to sex.

Does your wife express any pleasure in the fact that you are considering a vasectomy?

Yes she does. I let her know I'm taking a leap of faith. I was probably not as honest as I could have been about my decision earlier not to have a V. As I review my thoughts and really dug deep I think it has more to do with the fact that I didn't think anything would change sexually should I have one. I thought, why would I subject myself to something that has no benefit to me? In asking my wife I gather it will have "some" benefit to me in terms of her not worrying about an unwanted pregnancy, so the rest of it relates to eliminating those things that cause her not to desire sex. Not sure if it has to do with it, but she held my hand on date night in the car on the way home after knowing I got an appt for a V, arranged for a handyman next week, and made arrangements for some laundry service as well.


Married 15 years
12 y/o DD
10 y/o DS
6 y/o DD