I would agree with you if spending time together was the problem. It used to be actually but we both realized and understood the importance and we will get probably 20 hours together on a great week and maybe 10-12 on a bad one. Remember I have an unwilling participant in MB so asking her to meet my needs can be tough. For example I sent her a text 10 mins ago about working out together, then put kids down, then massage, then xoxo! After texting all morning back and forth, I got no response from this text. The UA time is not optimal because the feelings of romantic love aren't back yet for her. I can't spend as much time as I spent with her this weekend which was fabulous, and then get emotional and shoot out a DJ that in essence points out what a bad person she is for not meeting my needs, you know? That has been my pattern and I must break it.