Originally Posted by Hilltopper1972
This is kind of like picking and choosing your battles. Whereas we can't control our emotions and reactions to certain things, we CAN control how we respond to them with our brains. My heart told me to immediately point out an untruth, but my brain knew that keeping the conversation safe meant to take the high road. In addition my brain told me that there was no benefit in choosing to fight this battle whatsoever and that my wife's love bank and mine would both fall had I pursued it.


One thing my wife and I noticed after we got committed to not trying to straighten each other out, was that our children tried to do that to each other (and to us) all the time.

So now one of the things we are constantly saying is "Hey, don't try to straighten your brother out." And we hear hysterical cries from little guys of "S said .... " and we patiently reply "Just say 'Okay, S,'" and slowly but surely we are turning the hysteria off and raising kids who might be really nice and respectful adults some day.

It's really something to me when I see my own bad behavior executed by my child. Magnified, and done in a six year old way. smile

Teaching them serves as a reminder to me that it's okay if other people are "wrong" (i.e., remember something different from me) from time to time.

If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app!

Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8.
Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010

If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.