Originally Posted by Hilltopper1972
Originally Posted by hopelessinTX
Maybe this has been discussed before, sorry i didnt read all 160 pages in this thread. So forgive me if it was already discussed.

But you say you have 3 kids and one who is 18 months. Did you notice any changes in your wifes mood after she had her babies? Did it get progressively worse after each one? Is she a SAHM or does she work? What I am getting at is that could your wife prossibly have post partum depression? That can totally impact her self image, sex drive, and a host of other things. I personally know this as I had severe PPD after my first and aftermy second. Its horrible. She may be embarrassed to say that she is overwhelmed with the childcare and you may not see it as it may not be severe espeically if she is good at covering it up and faking being fine.

will she go to her doctor? Her primary care or OB? I would have her hormones, thyroid, and a depression screening done if she is willing.

Just a thought.

This theory is very possible. She is overwhelmed every single day of our lives from kids, laundry, etc. I'll read up on PPD because honestly I never had. She did have thyroid issues in the past, but nothing recently. This is why I suggested that maybe it has nothing to do with our relationship, but rather something physical or as you suggest PPD. Her body is basically off limits to me and she complains about her body daily. It has gotten progressively worse after each kid without a doubt.

can you hire a cleaning lady to help take soem of the cleaning chores and stress off her? Or even hire a mommys helper-a high school or even younger person to help with the kids, light cleaning, etc to take the load off? Do you tell her that she needs to do all the cleaning and cooking and etc or does she just do it? It is overwhelming to be a sahm taking care of kids and house and cleaning and clothes and cooking, etc. she might just need a break more often or have you take off some of the load and doing more around the house too. Just more thoughts.