Originally Posted By: markos
Rule number one: calm down.

Remember, Marriage Builders advice is not to confront without proof. Continue to snoop and verify all you want, but don't start buying into ideas like "I can't take it any more," etc. That's just setting you up to destroy all of the wonderful work you have been doing. It's hard enough to make love bank deposits as it is right now. Withdrawing them all is going to be a real big problem.

The number one problem in your marriage has been your emotional reactions being all over the map. That's still the number one problem in your marriage. You would love for it to be something else, because then that's less work for you.


I have a level head. I don't want a sexual rejection to turn into a nightmare. She is at the gym(again) and although I wish she had the same passion for me as working out, I won't complain about it. I work out too and sometimes we do together so I'd say that is a positive thing in our lives for now. Last night when she let me down again I could see in her eyes that she felt awful. Despite that she is just not up to it, despite being up to a myriad of other activities and that just sucks from my perpespective.


Married 15 years
12 y/o DD
10 y/o DS
6 y/o DD