Originally Posted by emilyann
I think most women in mutually satisfying relationships often agree to sex when it's not something they are "up to" at the moment, but they know it's something their husband really needs. And usually, it ends up being really good for her too (if her husband is smart).

Just wanted to point out that this is a very dangerous perspective because it leads to sexual aversions. The more she just does it - when she doesn't feel like it - the more she will avoid it and the more likely she will develop an aversion. If women don't enjoy sex they come to dread it. And the more they dread it the more they avoid it and begin to associate ALL interactions with that aversion.

The reason she doesn't want to have sex is because you are emotionally DETACHED, hilltopper. Women need 2 things to desire sex: an emotional attachment to the man and the prospect of enjoyment. When a woman is in love, she has no problem making love to her husband.

Hilltopper, I agree with the others that you need to get coaching from Steve Harley. I would get a session with him and he will help you persuade her to get on the phone with him. I wouldn't even check with her first. Just get a session for yourself and let Steve guide oyu out of this tar pit.


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101