CWMI,

If it was me I would be just like you. This woman would have a target on her back. I'm sorry, but she knows exactly what she's doing. Walking up to a man instead of a woman is a huge red flag. I think you're smart to have your eyes open. Watch your back and your H. Stay alert, friend.

I think pokerface has some great advice. Also the OW in my stint used the kids also and groceries (she worked at a grocery store).

FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.