I got quoted "easily over 1000" for a PI. I really don't have the money to blow on that. Which really sucks. They said military it's going to be extremely challenging to get anything anyway since restrictions on base entry. We have been talking daily and she has been polite and nice. No fighting from either of us. Although it seems like that eerie alien family vibe that we are faking being perfect so we don't have to deal with the truth? Idk.. Especially because I'm still blocked on some social networking and don't know her passwords anymore. She doesn't seem to be going back on that anytime soon. Said her life is less stressful now.
We exchange sexual pictures sometimes again too.. But she doesn't express her desire to be with me. She still insists I do not move in with her, rather I stay and go into the Air Force now and meet her later (6-8months). Insisting that we will be fine and this is best for our future. I'm basically following the "do what she tells you to do" attitude of trying to coax a spouse out of cheating and withdrawal. Arguing wont get me anywhere with her but ignored.
Like I said the love feels fake. I feel like when she says I love you it's just that she cares about my well being and feels for me, definitely not the I'm in love with you and want you type. Said she tried hard many times the past week to try to get the feeling back and can't bc it hurts too much. What is that supposed to mean hurt too much? I wasn't that bad.
When we do have our half [censored] emotion talks, it's only a few sentences and then she doesn't respond. Throughout the day it's just a couple sentences. Good morning, I'll talk to you later have a good day. Then after work she might say hi and that's about it. Before bed that she loves me and be careful at work. Bare minimum.
She's attempting this with me and yet is not fully into it. Could she be guarding herself still? It's only about week 2 into the madness. Could take months for her to warm up fully. But she sends me racy pictures. Is "more" friendly than at first... And states we will be ok. At the same time telling me she doesn't feel it right now and definitely cannot see me living with her now, but is speaking of our future later like it actually will exist.
All this coming from a girl who just weeks ago was extremely affectionate extremely horny for me and expressing her desires loudly for having children. All is completely opposite now. I'm lost