I've been on a dating break for the last two months or so. Trying to decide what to do. I got myself in a pickle and I'm stepping back to try to figure out where I went wrong. I had been dating salsa guy for a few months and things were progressing nicely, but then I wound up hanging out with IT guy- and fell for him again. So I dated both briefly while I tried to decide which I liked better. It was an awful and terrible idea. BUT I chose IT guy and we dated for about another 6 weeks exclusively, when I broke up with him. BOTH guys were really upset and wanted me back. I just felt like a jerk. SOOO, I'm taking some time off, trying to figure out what wasn't working. I've pinpointed a few of my struggles.

1. I need to listen to Indie and keep the dates daytime and light.

2. My emotional bank account has a leak and as much as I try to fill it, I feel like I'm always on empty. This makes me want to move too fast in relationships. I'm not sure what to do to fix that leak.

3. I hate breaking up with people. I know no one likes to break up, but it bothers me more than I should so I think I have some unresolved issues there as well. It always takes the guys by complete surprise as they think things are going great. I don't like breaking hearts.

4. I started back to work substitute teaching in hopes of finding something full time next year. It is going well, and I already have a long term substitute position lined up for January. It is nice to feel like I'm good at something. BUT my free time is really limited. Add to that some additional commitments at my church and I just haven't had much time to get out.

I feel like I should have some of this figured out before I date again, but not dating really takes a toll too. Not sure what to do.

BS-me 35
DS- 3.5 yrs old
DD 2 yrs old
Married for eleven years, together for fifteen
DDay August 2012 Found inappropriate text message
12/7/12 knew for sure he was sexting with men
12/9/12 Partial exposure, and truth about PA's revealed by WH
12/19/12 Full exposure
1/9/13 Plan B
Jan 2013 filed for divorce
1/27/2014 Divorce finalized