Originally Posted By: Greenmomma


Just me: I initially broke up with IT guy because we had too many differences on some of the major areas I was looking for compatibility- religion, politics, parenting. I choose IT guy over salsa guy because I felt I had a stronger emotional connection with IT guy and, to be honest, I was more physically attracted to IT guy. I broke up with IT guy the second time because he stopped putting in effort and I felt we didn't match sexually. My drive was much higher than his. There were several concerns I had about salsa guy. We've stayed friends and at this point the only two concerns I have left are that he teaches salsa classes which means he is surrounded by women all the time due to the nature of his job. That worries me only because of being cheated on- I'm not looking to take any huge risks this time around. And secondly- I am not that physically attracted to him. I hate that part because I feel really shallow, but if he looked like- oh I don't know insert handsome movie star here, I would still be dating him.


As far as how dating takes it toll- I am really bad at being single. I absolutely hate alone time. I have plenty of hobbies, and friends, but I just have always felt it is more fun to experience life with a partner. I am very extroverted. Yes I'm lonely, Yes I need male companionship! Yes I need to feel admired! I need to be touched! Ugh. Needy. This is what I mean about feeling like I'm on empty all the time.



I was the exact same as you! I hated being single. I suppose that's why I stayed in my previous relationships longer than I should have - it was more comforting than that the thought of being alone. For the first 6 months after it ended I did not have one Friday or Saturday that didn't include plans outside of my house. I did ok Sunday-Thursday but the anticipation of being by myself on a Friday or Saturday night made me crazy. Eventually the day came where I didn't make plans and I looked forward to a Saturday night alone with nothing to do, and that's when I knew I was ready.

If something bothers you even a little bit early on, then you're right to cut the loss right away and move on. Those things won't bother you less as time goes on, they'll only bother you more. It should be easy. Everything should be easy for you when you first begin dating someone.

As for salsa teacher guy - Latin dancing is so sexual, I would NOT be able to handle that either. No way Jose!